We aren't sure when Covid-19 will be clear to engage in everyday activities without mask, caution or sickness. What we do know is that life must go on and couples are finding ways to cope with weddings, family functions and gathering decisions. This can also be a tense time for couples because with limited interaction between families wedding decisions and guest concerns can cause friction. Here are some ways to negotiate your wedding or family gathering without getting on each others nerves.
1) Eliminate on both sides: When having a family function right now there are limitations. In order to be fair to each other take turns eliminating one person each until you meet your goal number. This way neither of you feel like you're eliminating more people.
2) Choose your words lightly. Don't say things that will cause the other to feel intimidated such as "Hate", "Irritate", "Gross" these can seem more like bashing words. When talking to each other about your plan simple phrases such as "Aunt Trudy is cut from the list because we need to keep her safe".
3) Choose venues with options. When you have an event a place with an outside and inside space may allow you to keep people distanced and can allow you to have less backlash about still hosting an event. This also allows you to come up with backup plans on guest, entertainment and food.
4) Don't argue about it. If something isn't going how you want to just stop thinking about it and come back to it the same time tomorrow. This will allow you to gather your thoughts about it and decide if it is that important to you.
5) Use this time to get to know each other. Right now is a great time to spend with each other and get to know what you want. Small trips, staying home and playing games or having a small couples dinner with a few friends can allow you to take the stress off events or a wedding.
6) Focus on the overall goal. If the overall goal is to have an event with less people be realistic. Prioritize your goals under the overall goal and stay focused on what you want to happen. For example; if the goal is to have a small birthday party with 20 people max and a drinking contest, your goal should be to invite people who drink and are responsible. Also, ask people if they are even attending events right now. Some may be turning down invites due to the illness.
The reason I keyed in on events for this blog post is because so many couples are having issues eliminating guest and it is causing friction. Just remember that any event you and your partner host is supposed to be enjoyable. Think outside the box during this time and celebrate things virtual or with less people. You'd be surprised how many people are not coming to events due to the Covid-19 and wouldn't mind be uninvited.
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